Marriage and Eternal Happiness

It has seemed to me that the media and society is promoting same-sex-marriage, infidelity in marriage, and promiscuity out side of marriage and it has really started to bother me.  I was reading in Moses chapter 3 about Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden and I really felt such a peaceful reassurance of what God’s design of marriage and sexual relations are designed to be like.  And I just want to share some of what I have learned and know to be true. Most of this post has been taken from the Institute Manual: The Pearl of Great Price Student Manual

In their proclamation on the family, the First Presidency and the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles declared: “Marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God” (Ensign, Nov. 1995, 102; see also Hebrews 13:4; D&C 49:15). Of note it only says between a MAN and a WOMAN.  No other coupling or scenario is ordained of God.  A fullness of joy in this life and the highest degree of exaltation in the celestial kingdom are obtained by entering into the new and eternal covenant of marriage (see 1 Corinthians 11:11; D&C 131:1–4; see also Boyd K. Packer, in Conference Report, Oct. 1993, 27–31; or Ensign, Nov. 1993, 21–24). 

God joined Adam and Eve together in marriage before the Fall. President Joseph Fielding Smith taught: “Marriage as established in the beginning was an eternal covenant. The first man and the first woman were not married until death should part them, for at that time death had not come into the world. The ceremony on that occasion was performed by the Eternal Father himself whose work endures forever. It is the will of the Lord that all marriages should be of like character, and in becoming ‘one flesh’ the man and the woman are to continue in the married status, according to the Lord’s plan, throughout all eternity as well as in this mortal life” (Doctrines of Salvation, 2:71).

The First Presidency and the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, in their proclamation on the family, taught: “By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children. In these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners” (Ensign, Nov. 1995, 102).

President Howard W. Hunter said the following about the relationship between a husband and wife: “A man who holds the priesthood accepts his wife as a partner in the leadership of the home and family with full knowledge of and full participation in all decisions relating thereto. … The Lord intended that the wife be a helpmeet for man (meet means equal)—that is, a companion equal and necessary in full partnership” (in Conference Report, Oct. 1994, 68; or Ensign, Nov. 1994, 50–51).

In Moses 3:24 it says:

24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife; and they shall be done flesh.

The word cleave means to be closely united. Adam and Eve were commanded to be “one flesh,” meaning to be one mentally, socially, sexually, and spiritually. This oneness was a command with which they could not fully comply until after the Fall.  Elder Jeffrey R. Holland, a member of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, explained:

“Human intimacy is reserved for a married couple because it is the ultimate symbol of total union, a totality and a union ordained and defined by God. From the Garden of Eden onward, marriage was intended to mean the complete merger of a man and a woman—their hearts, hopes, lives, love, family, future, everything. Adam said of Eve that she was bone of his bones and flesh of his flesh, and that they were to be ‘one flesh’ in their life together [see Genesis 2:23–24]. This is a union of such completeness that we use the word seal to convey its eternal promise. The Prophet Joseph Smith once said we perhaps could render such a sacred bond as being ‘welded’ [see D&C 128:18] one to another.

“But such a total union, such an unyielding commitment between a man and a woman, can only come with the proximity and permanence afforded in a marriage covenant, with solemn promises and the pledge of all they possess—their very hearts and minds, all their days and all their dreams” (in Conference Report, Oct. 1998, 100; or Ensign, Nov. 1998, 76).

Referring to the charge for a man to leave his parents and cleave to his wife, President Spencer W. Kimball said: “Do you note that? She, the woman, occupies the first place. She is preeminent, even above the parents who are so dear to all of us. Even the children must take their proper but significant place” (Ensign, Mar. 1976, 72).

I know that we will be happier and healthier by following this council.  I have been married for over 13 years now and I definitely do not know everything but I do know that the happiest and wonderfulness times have been with my wife and children.  It has been following the guidance of having my wife be my helpmeet.  By cleaving to her and to none else.  I know if the world will support God’s design for the family and upholds His commands on this matter that the world will be a happier and healthier place.  

20 Things I Love About My Wife!

1.     She loves the Lord.
2.     She loves me and has always loved me no matter what!
3.     She loves our kids.
4.     She has a Hart of Gold.
5.     She has forgiven me so many times for all my stupid mistakes that I could not even try to count them.
6.     She is patient.
7.     She teaches our kids and helps them grow both mentally and physically.
8.     She is thoughtful of others (for instance while at a family reunion she did all the dishes while every one else sat around and talked).
9.     She is humble.
10. She trusts the Lord. When He asks her to do something, she does it.
11. She is willing to learn and grow.  She takes classes in her spare time to improve herself and her family.
12. She serves others.  Once when she thought no one was looking, I watched her give money to a beggar on the street. She is always willing to serve at church or anywhere else that she is asked to serve.
13. She has a wonderful sense of humor and I love the sound of her laugh
14. She is extremely smart. She speaks two languages fluently
15. She is very courageous. She left every thing and came to immigrate unknown country.
16. She is so brave.
17. She is fun!
18. She loves animals.  She is allergic to cats and dogs but she still loves to pet and play with them, even though it means having a skin irritation for days afterwards.
19. She is a great daughter to her parents.
20. She is so good with money.  She is my voice of reason whenever we go shopping. 

Ask and Ye Shall Receive

A few years back I wrote my brother a letter on getting Devine inspiration.  He was going to the Lord asking about the most important question in his life: If he should ask his girlfriend to marry him or not.  I knew he probably knew all this stuff anyways but I thought it might help him to review it anyways before the trial of his faith.  I hope this can help you, my readers in some way.

Brother,

I know right now you are seeking guidance for the Lord on your relationship and I know that this is really between you, your girlfriend, and the Lord; but I felt like it might be a good reminder of how inspiration comes.  Again I know you know this but some times it is a good thing to review what you already know.  Please open up your scriptures and read these verses for yourself:

President Joseph Fielding Smith said:

“There is no reason in the world why any soul should not know where to find the truth. If he will only humble himself and seek in the spirit of humility and faith, going to the Lord just as the Prophet Joseph Smith went to the Lord to find the truth, he will find it. There’s no doubt about it. There is no reason in the world, if men would only hearken to the whisperings of the Spirit of the Lord and seek as he would have them seek for the knowledge and understanding of the gospel of Jesus Christ, for them not to find it—no reason, except the hardness of their hearts and their love of the world. ‘Knock, and it shall be opened unto you.’ This is my testimony, I know it is true.” (Joseph Fielding Smith, in Conference Report, Apr. 1951, p. 59.)

First, remember that revelation comes only by the Holy Ghost: D&C 8:2-3:

2 Yea, behold, I will tell you in your mind and in your heart, by the Holy Ghost, which shall come upon you and which shall dwell in your heart.
3 Now, behold, this is the spirit of revelation; behold, this is the spirit by which Moses brought the children of Israel through the Red Sea on dry ground.

Second, remember that you have to really, really ask: James1: 5-8:

5 If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.
6 But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering. For he that wavereth is like a wave of the sea driven with the wind and tossed.
7 For let not that man think that he shall receive any thing of the Lord.
8 A double minded man is unstable in all his ways.

I added the last couple of verses because just like it says you really, really must want to know.  I remember once on my mission that I had a dream that our Grandpa had died, and I was not sure if this was vision or just a dream but I decided I would ask Heavenly Father if Grandpa was still alive. It was important to me enough that I had decided that I was not going to stop praying until I had an answer and sure enough after a while I knew that Grandpa was still alive and that I just had a random dream.  Enos had a similar situation where he spent an entire day and night praying until he had received an answer (Enos 1:2-4).  I am sure that Enos would have spent several days there asking until he received an answer.

So now that we discussed how to ask, how does the Lord answer prayers? D&C 6: 14-16 & 22-24:

14 Verily, verily, I say unto thee, blessed art thou for what thou hast done; for thou hast inquired of me, and behold, as often as thou hast inquired thou hast received instruction of my Spirit. If it had not been so, thou wouldst not have come to the place where thou art at this time.
15 Behold, thou knowest that thou hast inquired of me and I did enlighten thy mind; and now I tell thee these things that thou mayest know that thou hast been enlightened by the Spirit of truth;
16 Yea, I tell thee, that thou mayest know that there is none else save God that knowest thy thoughts and the intents of thy heart.

22 Verily, verily, I say unto you, if you desire a further witness, cast your mind upon the night that you cried unto me in your heart, that you might know concerning the truth of these things.
23 Did I not speak peace to your mind concerning the matter? What greater witness can you have than from God?
24 And now, behold, you have received a witness; for if I have told you things which no man knoweth have you not received a witness?

And D&C 9:7-9:

7 Behold, you have not understood; you have supposed that I would give it unto you, when you took no thought save it was to ask me.
8 But, behold, I say unto you, that you must study it out in your mind; then you must cask me if it be right, and if it is right I will cause that your bosom shall burn within you; therefore, you shall feel that it is right.
9 But if it be not right you shall have no such feelings, but you shall have a stupor of thought that shall cause you to forget the thing which is wrong; therefore, you cannot write that which is sacred save it be given you from me.

Finally in D&C 11: 13-14 it says:

13 Verily, verily, I say unto you, I will impart unto you of my Spirit, which shall enlighten your mind, which shall fill your soul with joy;
14 And then shall ye know, or by this shall you know, all things whatsoever you desire of me, which are pertaining unto things of righteousness, in faith believing in me that you shall receive.

After you have received an answer it is then your responsibility to act on that answer without looking back.  It is my belief that all commands of God are of great importance and as such have just as much urgency and the direction to Lot to take his family and leave Sodom and Gomorrah and flee. 

Gen 19: 17 &26

17 …..Escape for thy life; look not behind thee, neither stay thou in all the plain; escape to the mountain, lest thou be consumed.

26 ¶But his wife looked back from behind him, and she became a pillar of salt.

I know we probably will not be turned into a pillar of salt for looking back for most guidance that the Lord gives but He is our Master and we know that he only wants what is best for us.  Also He knows the end from the beginning and we will never falter or fail by strictly following His commands and guidance.

I know you have a big decision to make and I hope that this long email will help you somehow in making the right decision.  My prayers are with you and I do not intend on this letter to mean that I am looking down on you or that you don’t already know all of these things.  I just hope that this might help you remember how the Lord works and also remember that it does no good to try and bargain with the Lord.  He knows what is best and it is always best to follow Him.

I love you and know you will make the right decision….whatever it may be.

Your brother

Joe