Home Coming

When I was in 9 years old, several times a week I would walk with my cousin to his house after school.Along the way there was a payphone right outside the bank that we would walk by.  We would always check to see if there was any money in the coin return of the phone and was always disappointed because there never was any.  Then one day we realized that we could make free phone calls to 911.  So we started prank-calling 911 on the way to my cousin’s house. 

 

One day, while at my cousin’s house, after our usual 911 prank-call; there was a knock on the door and a policeman was standing there.  He asked for my cousin and me by name and asked us to come talk with him in his car.  He asked us if we had been prank-calling 911.  I started to lie as much as I could trying to do my best to deny it.  But my cousin manned up and told the truth. 

The police officer decided to take me home so he could tell my parents what I have been doing.  When we got home my mother was there and was very surprised to see the police officer.  He told her what had happened and my mom sent to my room so they would talk more about the situation.

I will always remember the look on my Mom’s face when she found out what I had done.  It was the look of complete and utter disappointment.  It was the look of hurt and sadness for my actions.  It was the look of a mother who truly loved me and knew that I could have and should have done better.

In the end I received a spanking from my Dad when he got home. I was grounded for a few months.  I did not get an allowance for a while and for a long time I could not walk from school to my cousin’s house.  But the real punishment to me was the look on my Mother’s face.  That look has been seared into my brain. 

I promised myself that from that point on I would never do anything again that would cause my mom to have that same look on her face.  I know I have failed her multiple times after this instant and I have not have always been the type of son that I should have been.  But I can say I have never been forced to see that look of pure disappointment on my mother’s face. 

Submarine Homecomings

I love seeing submarine homecomings here in Pearl Harbor when a boat comes back from deployment.   Their loved ones are dressed in their Sunday best and brimming with excitement to see their husbands and fathers who they have not seen in half a year.  The Navy Band is out playing music and they usually have hula dancers there to welcome them.  But the best part is that all the ships that are inport sound their whistles repeatedly from the time that the submarine enters the final turn until she is near the pier she will moor.  This usually lasts for five minutes or so. 

All the sailors are dressed in their whites and are all clean-shaven but battle worn from being on deployment for over 6 months.

A ships whistle is pretty loud.  Per the 1972 International Regulations Preventing Collisions at Sea, a ship’s whistle is required to be able to be heard at a minimum of 1-2 nautical miles depending on the ship size.  So listening to 10-20 ships all sounding their whistles for ten minutes is an awesome experience.  It does not matter where you are at on base, what building you are in, or what you are going, you will still hear all the other ships welcoming home their brother-in-arms. 

As soon as the ship is moored family and friends are there to give their sailor a flower lay and hugs and kisses. 

So where am I going with these two stories?

Well, I see our homecoming with our Heavenly Father going something similar to one of these two experiences.  Will He have a look of disappointment on His face and sadness in His eyes when He will have no choice but to say:

 “Depart from me, ye cursed, into everlasting fire, prepared for the devil and his angels” Mathew 25:41

 Or will he wrap us in His arms and say: 

“Well done, good and faithful servant; thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy lord.” Mathew 25:23

I know what I want.  I love my Heavenly Father and just like with my mom I have promised myself that I will never see the look of disappointment on my Father in Heaven’s face.  I have made mistakes and will continue to make mistakes but I am improving and I am trying.  I think and I hope that I am a better person now that I was and I hope to be a better person tomorrow that I am today.  By continually being better and improving,  I know that I can hope to receive the hero’s welcome from Heavenly Father.

A Child’s Prayer

I love listening to my kids pray.  And I know that Heavenly Father does too.  My daughter (four years old) said a few weeks back during family prayer:

"Please bless that Jesus will be safe."  I don't think that is something we need to worry about anymore! I do know that she loves Him and I know that Heavenly Father is smiling down on her when she said this. 

Other times she has said:

“Please bless Jesus to come to our house.”

“Please bless Jesus come home safely.”

“Please bless Heavenly Father be nice.”

Some times she prays about no existing things as well.

“Please help Mickey Mouse.”  This is a common item that she prays about. I don't know how Heavenly Father will answer this prayer but I know that He does not mind hearing the sweet and pure request from a little child.

The other day she and her older brother were not getting along very well and when she said the blessing on the food, most of what she prayed about was asking that her brother would be nicer.  It was interesting to watch.  Her brother was obviously affected by this and I think he has tried to be nicer.  Since that instance, now when she prays she says how nice Isaac is and how he helps her.

I know that Heavenly Father loves to hear her prayers. I can see Him smiling down on my daughter and I am reminded I am so blessed to have her as my daughter.

Faith To Buy A House

New House we are buying in Kunia, Hawaii

We have just bought a house here in Hawaii.  It is a nice house in a nice area and we are looking forward to moving in and having a place that we will permanently have (at least for the next thirty years or so).   But it is scary.

It might seem crazy that we are buying a house right now.  I am getting out of the Navy at the first of February and I do not have a job lined up yet for when I get out.  No one would logically say that buying a house in the most expensive state without a job lined up or an idea of how much I will make if/when I find a job is a good idea.  (FYI the house cost $600K but this is on the low end of house prices for Oahu.  Average house prices are around $700K!)

So why are you buying a house now? 

Because just like Brigham Young, I know this is where my family is to settle down.  I have seen it in a vision; I saw my family being happy and blessed being together here in Hawaii.   That is all I saw.  I did not see what job I would have,  or what our house/apartment was like, or where in Hawaii we should live.  All I saw was that this is where we need to be.

Like the pioneers, we have moved every few years from state to state (and country to country) since my wife and I have been married.  Now that my kids are growing up and are starting school, I am glad that we are finally settling down.

But knowing that you should live in Hawaii does not mean that you need to buy a house now.  Wouldn’t it be smarter to wait, rent an affordable apartment now and buy a house when you know you have a stable job?

I initially thought the same thing.  Then one Sunday I remembered this talk by Elder Kevin R. Duncan, of the Seventy given in the October 2010 General conference: Our Very Survival

In it he tells of how some pioneers came to Utah and endured a hard winter and when spring came they were afraid to plant their seeds:

“A spirit of uneasiness began to descend upon the Saints. Some Church members declared that they would not build their homes in the valley. They wanted to remain in their wagons, for they were sure that Church leadership would herald them on to some better location. They had brought seeds and fruit plants, but they dared not waste them by planting in the barren desert wasteland.”

When I remembered this, I felt the loving chastisement of our Heavenly Father. I could almost hear Him ask me “Why are you afraid to plant your seeds? Did I know show you this is ‘The Right Place’?  You know this is where you are to settle, find a house and settle down.”

How could I argue with the God?  So we started looking at homes.  We started looking at everything.  Like I mentioned earlier, I do not know what job I will find or how much money I will earn so we can afford a home. So we looked at everything: from small one-bedroom apartments to million dollar homes.

I kept expecting a great manifestation that we have found “The Right House”.  But it did not turn out that way.  It really became more a process of elimination before we settled on the house.   We settled on this house because we did not get a negative feeling about it like the hundreds of others that we looked at.

I kept worrying that maybe I possibly could be mistaken that this was not the house that we should buy.  Maybe it is too expensive.  How are we going to afford it?  Then I came across this talk that John H. Groberg, then a member of the First Quorum of the Seventy of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, gave at Brigham Young University on 1 May 1979. 

Let me spend a moment on an item that I think a great many people, particularly members of the Church, do not understand. A lot of our people—including a lot of you—have great amounts of faith but sometimes tend to distort that faith a little by saying, "I am not going to move until I receive a positive assurance"—a burning in the bosom, as it were—"that that is the right thing to do."…
 …Let me tell what I have discovered—and this is somewhat repetitious. I do not say that we will not get that burning in our bosom, for we will when it is the right thing. In my life there have been quite a few occasions where there was absolutely no question about it—that burning was there. For instance, I have had the experience of installing stake presidents when there was absolutely no question, when I was positive that "that is the man to be the stake president now." It has happened in other situations also, but generally it has worked the other way—that is by eliminating the wrong directions to reveal the right direction, especially concerning our opportunities for progress in life in what we often term the temporal sense. We must try to figure it out ourselves. In the past I have tried out whether I should go into business or into teaching or into the arts or whatever. As I have begun to proceed along one path, having more or less gathered what facts I could, I have found that if that decision was wrong or was taking me down the wrong path—not necessarily an evil one, but one that was not right for me—without fail, the Lord has always let me know just this emphatically: "That is wrong; do not go that way. That is not for you!"
 On the other hand, there may have been two or three ways that I could have gone, any one of which would have been right and would have been in the general area providing the experience and means whereby I could fulfill the mission that the Lord had in mind for me. Because he knows we need the growth, he generally does not point and say, "Open that door and go twelve yards in that direction; then turn right and go two miles . . . " But if it is wrong, he will let us know—we will feel it for sure. I am positive of that. So rather than saying, "I will not move until I have this burning in my heart," let us turn it around and say, "I will move unless I feel it is wrong; and if it is wrong, then I will not do it." By eliminating all of these wrong courses, very quickly you will find yourself going in the direction that you ought to be going, and then you can receive the assurance: "Yes, I am going in the right direction. I am doing what my Father in Heaven wants me to do because I am not doing the things he does not want me to do." And you can know that for sure. That is part of the growth process and part of accomplishing what our Father in Heaven has in mind for us.

Like Elder Groberg said, we are moving on.  We do not feel like this is a wrong choice.  We are starting the next major step in our family journey and I know that Heavenly Father is happy with the path that we are on.  I just need to trust in Him and all the other uncertainties a head of me will turn out.

No Perfect Parent

Today in Sunday School we talked about how to raise righteous children and this was based on the lesson about the judges in the Book of Judges of the Old Testament. And I was thinking about Samson about how in reality his life was very sad and tragic. He could have been the greatest leader that Israel had ever had. But instead he chased after harlots and sexual sin. Then from the lesson I was reminded how his birth was miraculous. An angel told his mom about his birth and that he was to be raised a Nazarite. (The bible dictionary describes a Nazarite as a consecrated man.) And I am sure his parents did everything they could to raise him that way...but he chose not to follow. They tried to convince him not to marry outside of the faith but he would not listen. His story is one of pure selfishness and grief for all involved.

Like I am sure all parents do, I was worrying about how I can raise good kids and teach my children to love the Lord and to follow Him. And I came across this quote from Elder M. Russell Ballard.

"Be of good cheer. God did not put you on earth to fail, and your efforts as parents will not be counted as failure--unless you give up."

It occurred to me that every person born on this earth--with no exceptions--had imperfect parents. All of us are learning and growing while we struggle to raise our kids. The real secret to being a successful parent is just doing like Elder Ballard says, and never give up!    Ever! 

To be successful, we need to lean and trust in the One perfect Being.  The Savior will teach us and tell us how to raise our children.

I just need to lean on the Lord and trust in Him. I need to love my kids with all my heart and help them know their Savior. My kids are still very young. They cannot read the Scriptures. The only way they get to feel the Spirit in their daily lives is if I invite the Spirit to come into my home is by reading the scriptures with my family, praying with them, and actually teaching them the gospel.